By a big margin, most professional coaching experiences are successful. According to ICF (International Coaching Federation) survey numbers, 96% of those that go through a coaching process with a professional coach would do it again. In addition, according to ICF surveys, a stunning 99 percent of people who were polled said they were somewhat or very satisfied with the overall coaching experience. For those considering engaging with a professional coach, this is great information, and I expect will reduce the sense of risk in the coaching experience for many.
But, sometimes coaching does fail. To my experience this sense of failure, not reaching or exceeding expectations, is a small minority, but it does happen. Drawing from my years of coaching experience, here are some reasons I think coaching experiences may fail to meet expectations.
The Wizard Stigma: I think that some client’s expectations are that the coach’s knowledge, or techniques border on the supernatural. This (small) group somehow has the notion that coaches possess a body of secret knowledge that will propel the client forward to deliver the client’s goals with little, or no effort. The truth is, the coaching experience boils down to work. A trained coach understands that the Client sets the goals, and both the Client and the Coach do work to move the Client closer to delivering their goals. When I do consultations with coaching prospects, I say “there is no unicorn dust”. Yes, I have knowledge in my niche area of career coaching, and yes, I have gone through training to learn some techniques that will probably give an edge to my Clients as they move forward in their career goals. But essentially progress comes down refining goals, and taking action steps. Without actually doing the action steps Clients tend to flounder. And unfortunately, this is something I have seen firsthand.
Commitment-less: As mentioned above there are normally action items that the Client (and sometimes the Coach) needs to complete to start moving their plans forward. From my experience, those clients that don’t complete the action steps, or only partly complete the steps, from one session to the next are those that tend to stagnate during the coaching experience. In short, they stay in a holding pattern, and don’t seem to get traction. Said another way, those Clients that take the coaching process seriously, are those that tend to move their life, and their career forward. And based on follow-ups I have done with past clients, those who put effort into the coaching experience are those who tend to have success on their goals. Looking at both sides of the equation, I expect there might be coaches out there that don’t take the coaching relationship seriously themselves. I expect these are in the minority. One litmus test on picking a coach is to understand the amount of effort they have put into becoming a coach. Have they gone through training? And if they received training, how much training, and over what period of time? Are they certified, or licensed? These are all good questions to ask when considering hiring a coach. In my case my coaching training took several months. I have not once regretted putting the time and money into my training.
Who’s Driving: Another potential failure is when the coach assumes the driving position. I could see this happening when a coach becomes locked in to their own processes. They may steer the Client into practices, and processes they have seen work with other Clients, but may not be appropriate for all Clients. This is essentially trying to make a round peg fit in a square hole. One way a Coach can guard against falling into this trap is to actively listen. All good coaches understand that if they know how to listen – their Client will tell them where they want the coaching sessions to go. Good coaches also understand they need to let go of expectations of where they want the coaching session to go. The Client actually knows best where to take the session, and the Coach needs to listen and follow their lead. It should be said there are subtle benefits the Coach can provide in sessions. These are the ability to articulate the goal, or block, and once the focus of the session is agreed on, to set guardrails for the discussion. By doing this the Coach increases the value of the session, and keeps the conversation focused. The key here for the coach is to really listen for the Client’s needs, articulate this, and then ask open ended questions so the Client drives the conversation. If you have engaged with a Coach, and feel the Coach is not really hearing your needs, and seems to be driving the conversation, my suggestion is to tell your Coach this. If it continues, you probably have engaged with a coach that is working their agenda, not listening to yours. It might be best to end the relationship, and look for a different Coach.
If you do a reasonable amount of screening you can feel pretty confident that your coaching experience will be a good one. Reasonable screening includes asking if the potential Coach has been trained to do coaching, and if so for how long. Did the training take weeks? Months? Or was it a weekend worth of work? Other screening includes asking if the Coach is licensed or certified. According to the book, Advancing Executive Coaching (Gina Hernez-Broome, Lisa A. Boyce) 62% of the coaches they surveyed had no certification at all. Once you do find a good Coach, have a conversation to make sure you understand what can be expected as the outcome of the coaching relationship. If your expectations are unrealistic, you may be setting yourself up for disappointment. Ask yourself “is this coach a good listener?” Great coaches have extraordinary listening skills. The make a practice of not interrupting the Client, even if the question of statement seems out of topic. A great Coach is a great listener, who encourages their Clients to talk, express their feelings, and think out loud. If your Coach is a great listener they have mastered the most important skill a Coach can have. If this is the case, you should feel confident about engaging with this Coach. Also, do a reality check to make sure you can stay committed to the coaching process. This means making a commitment of time, effort, and showing up to any scheduled coaching sessions. And spend some time considering what your goals are for engaging with a Coach. It is a good idea to write these down. Some Coaches even provide a form to collect your goals and set expectations for the Coaching experience. Do these things and you should be confident that you will have a positive coaching experience, as the vast majority of past coaching Clients have.
Author: Brian Kail, MBA, CPC is a professional Career Coach, and Business Mentor. For more information see AscendProCoach.com
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